Requesting a reference letter
Where do reference letters come from?
Academic reference letters tend to come from volunteering in a lab.
The best academic reference letters come from volunteering in a lab for multiple years. The entirety of your relationship gets distilled into the letter so the better and longer the relationship, the better and more complete the reference letter.
You will want to aim to get at least two great reference letters. Three would be best.
One will likely come from the professor with whom you work on your honours thesis.
Reference letters can also come from being in a professor's class.
Sometimes you can build a relationship with a prof in a course, often in upper-year seminar courses. These reference letters are generally a bit weaker since your relationship is much less developed. Theoretically, if you took multiple classes and you stood out in each of them, you could get a higher-quality reference letter. Just taking a course isn't enough: you need to stand out in a positive way (and definitely not a negative way). If you're not sure if the prof likes you or not, you should probably try for someone else that you are quite sure likes you.
One of my two letters came from a prof who's seminar class I took.
I made a big impression on him, which is easier to do in a seminar class with only a dozen or so students. I knew he liked my style and my work in the class went above and beyond the assignment (I started digging and found a scandal he wasn't aware of). After this, I continued to build a relationship with him by doing some paid programming work in his lab. We chatted a few other times so we built a bit more of a connection. Our personalities played well together so I figured he was a good choice to ask.
Some reference letters can come from relevant employment situations.
The quality of these letters depends on the relevance of the employment and on the praise given to you in the letter, which depends on your relationship. When it comes to letters from work, you might want to have more of a hand in suggesting that the letter-writer call out specific skills you have developed at work or specific positive traits you have displayed. Translate your work experience into evidence that you have relevant skills that will help you succeed in the academic world. For example, if you worked at a crisis hotline, that could be framed as evidence that you can operate well under pressure. If you worked in customer service handling returns, that could show that you can handle conflict. Other positions could show time-management or even project-management skills.
Letters from work are not inherently "better" or "worse".
You wouldn't want all your references to come from work, though.
You want to show academic support, too!
Who writes the letter?
The exact person that pens the letter depends on different situations.
- Sometimes professors will ask the student to write the reference letter themselves, then edit it and sign off.
- Sometimes the person you worked with most closely will write the letter, then have the PI sign off.
- Sometimes the PI themselves will write the letter.
Whoever writes the letter, the PI is generally the one that signs it.
A reference letter looks better coming from a PI rather than a grad student even if you worked closely with the grad student.
How to ask for a Reference Letter
When asking, you should be succinct and provide as much detail as you can.
Make sure you give the person you're asking plenty of time to answer. PIs can get quite busy, especially at certain times of year. Aim to give them at least a month with all the following materials before the letter is due. Feel free to give up to two months, but don't bother them before that, otherwise they'll be more like to forget such a distant deadline.
When you volunteer in a lab, keep track of dates and other logistical details yourself. That way, when you ask for a reference letter, you can send along an information package.
When an RA asks me for a reference letter, I ask them to send the following information:
- start month in the lab
- total number of months you've been volunteering, noting any break periods (don't count summer/lack of work as break, just if you needed to take a break for a time, which may not have happened)
- description of 1) the various tasks you undertook in the lab and 2) skills you believe you have cultivated from each of these tasks
- anything you specifically want me to highlight
- any other relevant factors, e.g. if you were working a job at the same time or working in multiple labs, etc.
- CV
- unofficial transcript
- any relevant details you know about the programs you're applying to, e.g. your specific interests
- if you know the supervisors you're applying to, please send along their names
- administrative details you know about, e.g. deadlines, page-limits, etc.
Most academics would probably be suitably impressed if you sent along such a detailed information package. It could save them from having to ask you.
Otherwise, just send an email or ask in person. Don't beat around the bush. Academics know that they will need to write reference letters! You won't be the first or the last to ask them so don't feel shy about it.
A wise way to ask is to ask if they are willing and able to provide a strong reference letter, not just "a reference letter". That way, if they don't feel like they can earnestly write something strong, they can decline. Anyone can say yes if you ask for "a reference letter", but, if you ask for a strong reference letter, they should tell you whether they can provide that or not. You don't want to ask someone for "a reference letter" only to receive reluctant agreement and a lukewarm or neutral reference letter. Such a reference letter is as "red flag" in an application.
The phrase damning with faint praise comes to mind.
If they decline or say they are too busy, accept that response.
It might sting, but this should be pretty rare. Still, if they decline, there is no point pushing: you don't want a reference letter from someone that isn't willing! That would be a bad reference letter anyway. It might put you in a scramble to find someone else, but, if you've been following this advice, you asked them early enough that you have some time to think about other options. If you still can't think of any and deadlines are looming, you might want to revisit your non-academic exit strategies. If you don't have the required number of reference letter, that is no point applying since you'll be competing against people that do have their reference letters.
Conclusion
Reference letters are best when they come from someone who will praise you strongly.
The ideal would be someone that is current faculty and that supervises graduate students since they would have the most credible commentary.
If you've been working in industry and your get a really glowing letter written by your boss or your boss's boss, that also looks good.
Reference letters are not a science, like a GPA where higher = better.
Reference letters can communicate more nuanced factors, but whatever else they communicate, they need to be very positive about you and your prospects.
If you cannot get two people that will write glowing reviews of you, that absence speaks against your application.
Ideally, volunteering involves building a genuine relationship.
By the end of a few years volunteering and ingratiating yourself, you might be attending lab holiday parties and you might even get invited to the PI's house. At that point, there should be no question in your mind that this person wants you to succeed and will write a strong reference.
However your application goes, send a thank you!
If someone provides a letter for you, send them a follow-up email once you know the status of your application. Let them know how it want and thank them, whatever the outcome. Whether you share a celebration or a consolation, the point is that you are maintaining the relationship.
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